DISCLAIMER: This article was written through support from our Patreon subscribers. You can also give us money through Patreon.com. Videogames will bring the world together…and we’re committed to helping it happen. ALSO this Review includes SPOILERS for River City Girls. The archetypal Saturday Morning did not exist for me. Cartoons aired late in the…
OBJECT OF POWER
CW: DISCUSSION OF GUN VIOLENCE, Viewer discretion is advised. In the real world, I am mostly powerless. I can sit at my desk, but unless I go to the gym, I can’t throw it at anyone. Frequently I am also immobilized by bureaucracy and rules that if not impossible to navigate the world by,…
OFFICE
before you read this article, please take a moment and read about the much more important news happening this week: https://www.themarysue.com/video-game-metoo-allegations/ All of us know someone who’s had to spend most of their life inside of an office. The friend that seems to always be working either too late or too early. Often,…
MAKE YOUR EVO MOMENT
EVO – the largest fighting game tournament in the world, has once again come and gone. Rather than missing out in a bedroom watching over the internet, I spent this last weekend in Las Vegas where it’s held. In a plastic chair sometimes less than a few feet from the stage, I got to watch…
HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY!
The 4th of July is the most American holiday there can be. Unlike other crass grabs at commercialism, the 4th of July has one simple message: Even though everything is fucked up and people are dying, you need to shut up and ignore it and enjoy being an American. In that spirit, let’s say “hoo…
CASTLEVANIA: STOP WORRYING ABOUT YOUR TOYS
(THIS ARTICLE WAS MADE POSSIBLE THROUGH DONATION. IF YOU WANT TO SEE MORE SPECIFIC VIDEOGAMES FEATURED, YOU CAN GO HERE) In preparation for Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night’s latest attempt to resurrect what some people love about Castlevania, I’ve spent the last month playing a previous attempt at the same thing. Castlevania: Lords of Shadow was…
WHY DO I GOTTA KEEP BUYIN SHIT!
Advertising doesn’t seem to end now: The videogames I play or the movies I watch extend out from the media that they’re captured on. They become Forever topics of conversation. “Did you think about this [Probably Marvel Movie Thing] or did you see [X Trailer Revealed at E3]” The most harmful part of it? The…
Witness Jonathan Blow
God Bless Jonathan Blow; that is the opening statement to my lecture. MY lecture is about how important ass holes like Johnathan Blow are. Johathan Blow’s greatest contribution to videogames might be him making a 3D version of the box game a few years ago. Perhaps Johnathan Blow’s greatest contribution to videogames is Braid, the…
THE FRIENDS OF RINGO ISHIKAWA
Platform: Nintendo Switch Released: April, 2019 Publisher / Localization: CIRCLE Ent. Developer: yeo Sometimes I get really busted up about how much time I don’t have for playing videogames. The new ones that come out all want me to be the game I play forever – we’ve been doing that song and dance since 2008….
FATALITY
Have you ever seen a friend get injured? If you have, or if you’ve really just ever had to watch anyone get injured: you know that violence hurts to watch. The sound and sight of someone getting injured has a way of burning itself into your brain. Mortal Kombat 11 gave several members of its…